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Hair Today

GARETH'S DAD:  Do you know what I paid for a haircut the other day? Eight pounds! Eight pounds for a haircut. What do you pay for a haircut, Gareth?

GARETH:  I haven't paid for a haircut for about ten years. I wish I could pay eight pounds for a haircut.

D:  Well if you grew your hair back you could go get it cut!

G:  Dad, I don't have any hair to grow back.

D:  Yes you have! If you just stopped shaving it all the time, you could get a proper haircut!

G:  But I haven't got any hair left!

GARETH'S MUM:  He hasn't got any hair left!

D:  Yes he has! He's got plenty of hair.

M:  He doesn't have any hair on top!

D:  Yes he does, he just shaves it all off!

M:  You're dreaming. I'm telling you, he hasn't had hair on top for years!

G:  Yeah, thanks Mum.

dinner time
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About Shauna Reid

Ahoy there! I’m an author, copywriter and old school blogger. I love telling stories about life and helping my clients to tell theirs. Find out more about me and how we can work together.


16 thoughts on “Hair Today

  1. I hope the Costanza’s (being the ultimate in dysfunctional families) aren’t a true reflection of Dr. G’s parental sanity situation… though I do love them! I could watch endless Seinfeld.

    Love your blog Shauny

  2. Oooo, poor Doctor G.

    Does this mean you’re going to post about man-boobs soon and the invention of the man bra aka George Costanza style? 😉

  3. Gareth, mate that is so funny.

    As a wee guy i got a skinhead as I knew my barnett was doomed, so when nature lightened the load no one noticed.

    see what i did there?

    Shaunna, as ever great piece.*

    pol x

    * not a sandwich reference I hasten to add.

  4. Well, I spend my life saying “You are NOT going bald. And stop pulling your hair out.”*

    Poor Dr. G indeed. Mind you, I haven’t paid for a haircut for over ten years, either. Hairdressers are scary; he’s well out of it!

    *It’s a nervous habit, and it drives me absolutely bananas! Do not start doing this, gentlemen. There’s even a NAME for pulling your own hair out: trichotillomania.

  5. ahhh parents. It’s a wonder we’re not all in a mental institution rocking ourselves to sleep holding a shank made from a filed down toothbrush.

  6. Peed my pants when the picture came up, I had to re-read it with Costanza-like Scottish accents in my heid.

    Kirsten – does nose hair pulling count?

  7. I have an acquantance who pulls out her hair. She has to wear a wig all the time. I wondered if there was a medical term for it. How horrible for her (and her poor tortured husband).

    Shauny great story as always.

  8. Tell Gareth’s Dad he can get a set of hair clippers for ten quid – two haircuts and he’s in profit. That should appeal to a Scotsman. Mind you it’s not the same as having the young ladies leaning over you at the unisex hairdressers, is it?

    My cure for baldness ? Pull your hairout and it grows twice as fast. It works with my nose hair all the time !

  9. I don’t even want to THINK about nose-hair pulling. It sounds far too painful. (No, I couldn’t wax my legs, either.)

    Yes, there are people who obsessively pull loads of their hair out. Which must be pretty bad – like a form of self-harm, really. At least the boyf only does it a little bit.

  10. Plucking your nose hairs can be really dangerous. Something about those hairs makes them more likely to become ingrown and fester. Winston Churchill nearly died because he got a boil up his nose after plucking, it got infected, and the nose is pretty close to the brain.

  11. i am forever amazed at where these comment threads end up. i’m glad i’ve already eaten rosemary 😉 can’t get churchill’s festering nose out of my mind…

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