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El Residente

My visa arrived in the mail today. You'll never get rid of me now, Britain!

In the end there was no need for immigration lawyers or angry letters to MPs or copulation on the steps of the Home Office to prove our devotion. I simply sent them 58 new pieces of evidence. And one lovely letter of hearty endorsement from Rory.

You may ask why I didn't just send 58 pieces of evidence in the first place. But when the form requested "a minimum of 10 and ideally 20", somehow I missed the invisible sentence that followed, "and another 38 would be quite handy."

My advice to anyone planning to apply for permanent residency: start saving everything. Every bank statement, insurance policy, phone bill, Post-it note, parking ticket, Durex wrapper, milk carton, flat tyre and soggy teabag. Put it all in a big box and send it to the government. Recorded delivery, of course.

Gareth has already skipped off to see his solicitor. I personally wanted to go to Reno so we could end this charade in sunny Nevada where it all began. But now that I'm a permanent resident of Scotland I'm far too tight to fork out for airfares. Seriously comrades, I'm happy. I love this wee country. Thank you for your kindness and tolerance during my moments of madness. You rule the school.

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About Shauna Reid

Ahoy there! I’m an author, copywriter and old school blogger. I love telling stories about life and helping my clients to tell theirs. Find out more about me and how we can work together.


63 thoughts on “El Residente

  1. YEEEEEESSSSS!!! Shauna, that’s brilliant. Our wee dreich country is lucky to have you! Congratulations, hope you get to celebrate today! xx

  2. What are the statistics on Australians applying for residency in the UK, and UKians (sorry) applying for residency in Australia? Is it 1:10? 1:100?

    Scotland’s lucky to have you. Next time I visit the Wig & Pen I’ll say hello to all the British backpackers and tell them that with Shauna safely tucked away in Scotland it’s OK for all of them to stay here. Fair trade, I guess.

  3. Yay, congratulations Shauny, that must be a weight off.

    You can now officially have all your clothes made in the family tartan and drink irn bru for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

    S

  4. Yay, congratulations Shauny, that must be a weight off.

    You can now officially have all your clothes made in the family tartan and drink irn bru for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

    S

  5. If the UK does NOT have a red arrow ‘woohoo’ in its residence permits, I am going to be so sad. I do so hope you didn’t put that in there with some Photoshop skills, but that someone somewhere far away in London decided that the ‘CD-halo’ above the photo, ‘bull that sort of looks like an island’ at the bottom, and ‘bit old red woohoo arrow’ were all necessary parts of living in the UK. I’d feel much better being British knowing that I didn’t NEED a red woohoo arrow, I was born with one…

    Glad they stopped messing with your mind, dear, delighted you’re staying.

  6. thankYOUUU lovelies! the irn brus are on me.

    i wish it was a real arrow, donalda! it would show a human side to those numpties.

    i am really disturbed by the photo… all the colour seems to have leaked out of it! where did my nose go? i look rather stern and my eyes are scaring me, looks like i might stab somebody. i’ve been living in fife too long.

  7. Good Lord!
    I’ve been with Ev so long it feels like we were born together and I’m not sure I could come up with 58 pieces of evidence to prove it! Luckily we have two children so that only leaves 56.
    Well, congratulations on making through!

  8. Congrats, Shauna. We felt the same when my SC got his green card here in the U.S. After much hand-wringing and letters to Congresspeople, etc. (But no attorneys. Bah.) Glad to know you’ll likely still be in Scotland for our next visit — June-July 2008. And stop by if you’re in the SF Bay area or NYC.

  9. Woohoo! Congratulations!!!!! Fantastic news.

    You’d think with all the effort required to get one, they’d make the permits nicer looking :/ Nearly as weird as the new US passports.

    Does that make any difference to your European travels or does it just make it possible to get back into the UK (or Scotland as it may be soon!)?

    About this time you’ll get homesick for Australia 😉

    Scott F 🙂

  10. Oh congrats, Shauny! I’m totally jealous, of course. If only it were so easy for US citizens to gain residency (and work visas!) in other countries…

  11. Cheers Ellen and Paul! And I will do, Pamela!

    Devlyn – Aww 🙂 If you were to marry a UK citizen it would be equally “easy” for you! It’s the same process no matter where you come from 🙂

    Scott – It doesn’t make much difference, just when I fly back to the UK hopefully they’ll grill me less at immigration now that it’s a permanent visa! Hehe.

  12. Yay! What a relief, eh? Now you can concentrate on more pleasant projects. Like writing that book, which I am dying to read. And biking on curves. And putting glow-in-the-dark stars on the bedroom ceiling! (what? doesn’t everyone do that?)

    Congratulations. 🙂

  13. Nyad, do they still make those stars? I used to LOVE those! The Mothership wouldn’t let me have them.

    Cheers Vicky! Next year I can do the Life in the UK test and go for citizenship. I heart beaurocracy 🙂

  14. Yay! I’m so happy for you. It was Nail-Biting Time for a bit there, but I’m glad the Home Office came to their senses eventually.

    I’m a bit nervous about having to go through all this myself in a year and a half, actually. Getting the fiancee visa to come over to London and get hitched was hard enough… and the 2-year “limited leave to remain” visa was SO frickin’ expensive. Five hundred quid! Blimey.

    It’s hard to know what 58 pieces of evidence I should be collecting for the next step. How did you work it out? Those bureaucrats are tricksy bastards.

  15. Well done Shauna, that’s such exciting news – it’s always so much of a relief when you have the sucker in your hands. Richard, my partner got his residency (here in Australia) two years ago. At the time we were pretty confident he’d be accepted, but we were both so happy and relieved when he got the stamp in his passport.

    Congratulations

  16. Hooray! Wonderful news.

    Now you just need to invent a spray that will make the invisible sentences and clauses on government forms appear, so that those who follow behind you will know in advance to send at least 58 pieces of evidence.

  17. Well done and congratulations. But what on earth will you do to occupy your spare time now you have rid yourself of endless reams of red tape?

  18. Yay Shauny, I’m really happy for you 🙂 )

    I am also experiencing the government’s invisible clauses— I am for some reason unable to get proper ID in my own country!! I do not understand, but apparently it’s something to do with having lived for at least part of my life overseas. Because obviously, no REAL Australian, worthy of ID, would ever leave our sacred shores…. yeah right! Erm, anyway…. yes. Hooray for you!!! Now go out and celebrate some more.

  19. HOORAAAAAAAAAY! So glad to hear it, Shauny. Excellent work. 😀

    PS: They say that if you look like your passport photo then you are too sick to travel. Does this apply to other photo IDs? – obviously not. You look great!

  20. here’s tae us, an them like us, gang few an they’re all deid!

    Toasts the new Scot with Irn Bru, then rolls her in pork then bread crumbs and then deep frys her.

    It’s EnScotchcment.

    Congrats to you both.

    I remember my Permenant residency for Oz coming through.

    marvellous feeling

  21. As someone who just posted off her HSMP app for staying in Edinburgh, I was totally bricking it after reading your last post. I thought if they won’t let shauny in, i’ve got no chance! I’m now feeling much better 🙂 Congrats!

  22. Shauna,

    Spacetoys.com carries the glow-in-the-dark stars. As do lots of other sites/ toy stores.

    I guess my parents were sort of the opposite of the Mothership in terms of sensible decorating style. They saw my stars in my college dorm, and proceded to put them in every bedroom at home. And to buy packs for all my uncles and aunts, so they too could join the glowing ceiling cult. My dad is 70 now, and they just moved into a nice little house. He hit the science museum right away for more little stars.

    You’re never too old for stars! http://www.spacetoys.com/proddetail.php?prod=TGK10

  23. HUZZAH! I well remember the pain we went through in collecting all the evidence for mah husband’s PR here in Oz. But it’s all worth it in the end. Congratulations!

  24. There is something so, so British about “leave to remain”. Makes them sound downright snobbish, doesn’t it?

    Anyway, congratulations on being able to live in the same country as your husband. It’s always a plus when you’re trying to run their lives if you can do it face-to-face 😉

  25. Congratulations! Although I must admit, I was sneakily hoping for a bit more of your humour shenanigans before those bureaucrats got their act together. Aw shucks.

  26. yay

    i knew you would do it ….

    whatya gonna wear under yer kilt now you’re a real scot?

    hehe

  27. Aww CHEERS you legends 🙂

    Kimba – Ooh I can imagine. If we move over to Oz we’ll get to go through this all again with Gareth, except everyone tells me it’s even more traumatic going the other way!!

    Witold! You’re alive! 🙂 I would elect to get rid of the king for good. Hehe.

    Bobby – I just don’t have the legs for those mini kilts all the gals wear… Slut Kilts as I call em. My legs are pale enough now but far too doughy. Hehe.

    Frangipani – I knooooow! I was hoping to be dragged in for an interview. Just to have the opportunity to prove what morons they are in person. Disappointin’ 😛

  28. Congratulations!

    Having gone through the Australian PR one part way and done the 2-year visa for the UK, I am very happy for you! I’m sure with Gareth’s you’ll have saved every single thing you have ever done together and will be able to get it nae bother.

    I’m not looking forward to having to do it all over again to get my visa renewed. Sigh. I hate having to live our lives with a view to how the Home Office might see it, not how we might be happy.

  29. Woohoo! Oh yeah. You already said that bit. But double it ey?

    Although I am overwhelmingly excited for you and the Doctor I am a little sad that I will not see any forthcoming pastels from the Bungle Bungles.

    x

  30. Isn’t it funny that they call it LEAVE to remain?

    Congratulations to you, you had me worried for a bit here! I’m so happy for you – and a bit jealous, too… but at least I am going to Scotland and England on holiday at the end of June… can’t wait! Who knows, I might just meet a HotScot while I’m there! 😉

  31. umm you shouldnt post that kind of info on the web…this advice coeming (free) from a lawyer

  32. Hey Shauny – just a warning:

    You’re not allowed to display these types of Visas on the internet. You could get in trouble (probably won’t get it taken off you but best not to tempt fate).

    I had a mate with an Irish one who did the same thing and received a very irate call from the Irish Immigration Office!!!

    Other than that – we all share your joy!

  33. Woohooo! What a shame you have to have something legal that has the word ‘Croydon’ on it though

  34. Okay I removed the picture. I’ve seen people post theirs before on Flickr so didn’t think anything of it at the time! I blanked out the number and there’s no details on there that aren’t already freely available (my name and D.O.B). But tis best to play it safe eh? Thanks chaps 🙂

    And nice one, Mark. Heheheheeeee!

    PS checkout my puffin pic instead 😛

    PPS there was a surly anon comment above so i yoinked it. don’t really want that sorta vibe round here.

  35. I’m confused; why would you… oh, wait. “Durex” doesn’t mean ‘sticky tape’ over there, does it?

    Two countries separated etc.

  36. I am a little late (I’ve been away sunning myself) but hurrah, and we love you too (I count myself an honorary resident of Scotland … Scottish mother and 4 years there, plus 2 days next week?!)

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