The NaNoNovel was finished at 4pm today. After thirty days of spelling out every word (we party like it is nineteen hundred and ninety nine, not like it’s 1999), it all died in the arse in the last thousand words. The final sentence went something like, “So she quit her job and nicked off to Russia. The End.”
Clocking in at 50,101 words and 145 pages, I couldn’t resist clogging up the printer at work to print the whole thing out. And of course, there had to be a paper jam around the steamy scene on page 98. Could have been embarrassing. So here it is in all its twelve point Century Schoolbook glory.
The question is, what to do with it now? Does one plug on, rounding out characters, filling in the yawning chasms in the plot? Does one tinker away for another 30,000 words to make it novellish then try to fulfil the lifelong dream of getting published?
Ha! Here are some better ideas:
Put under the christmas tree and give to some poor sucker who you don’t really like.
Place on your bookshelf beside the other fine works of literature and hope noone notices the difference.
Stick it in the loo to prevent those agonising moments when you realise it was your turn to buy more loo paper but you just gosh darn forgot.
Give to your dog as part of his daily requirement of complex carbohydrates.