Who invented the Hot Dog Maker? How fucking difficult is it to heat up a bloody hot dog? Have you looked at the kitchen appliances on offer these days?
There's the Muffin Maker, in which you can make a grand total of three muffins at a time. Ditto for the Pie Maker and the Omelette Maker. Then there's the Popcorn Maker, Sandwich Grill, Health Grill and Rice Cooker.
always thought you could achieve all those bloody things and more with a normal old stove and a frying pan. But no, it seems you need a different applicance for every dish and your shiny new applicance is guaranteed to make the job Quicker and E-Z and 97% Fat Free!
Chances are, I'll come home from work tomorrow, fling my bag down in the hall, scratch my chin thoughtfully and remark to Harry, "You know Harry, I really feel like prime beef fillet served on a bed of dirty carrot tops and poached hummingbird eggs with a rosemary and deer antler jus." And Harry will turn to me and say, "Well it's funny, today I just popped down to the shops and bought the brand new Breville Easy Prime Beef Fillet Served On A Bed Of Dirty Carrot Tops And Poached Hummingbird Eggs With A Rosemary And Deer Antler Jus Maker! It's so easy that even me, your flea ridden companion, can be a gourmet chef! I simply throw in the ingredients, press Start and walk away. Twenty minutes later you'll be dining in style."
It's hot today and I'm cranky. Mission Impossible 2 is one of the worst movies ever made.