Dumpster Diving

Last night I hosted my first ever slumber party. Oooh, pillow fights and talking about boys. I never had one as a kiddie because our household was rather insane and I didn’t want my friends seeing that. Besides, you had to open three different sets of gates, cross a trickle of a creek and wade through sheep shit to actually get there.

Quite often, I am a really crap friend. I go into little black episodes in which I withdraw from everyone. While I do this because I feel wimpy and unworthy of their company, they interpret it as me being a big old snobbypants who doesn’t care about them.

But this week I was on a mission. I caught up with my brilliant best mate from uni after three years, dinnered with a highschool pal, slumber partied with brilliant blogger ladies, and coffee-ed with two other great mates (who I hadn’t seen in six months even though they live five minutes down the road).

It was all good. So yes, I am a moody little brat sometimes, and to anyone that considers me to be friend or acquaintance, online or off, just know that you all rock my socks, and if I ever made you feel like I didn’t care, I apologise. I have this thing where I convince myself that if I don’t maintain a certain level of entertaining anecdotes, stupid jokes, dirty comments and good cooking that my friends will decide they don’t like me.

In an attempt to be dazzling, I cooked this huge leg of lamb last night with all sorts of fancy things stuffed in it. What I have learned: If you want to impress your friends by serving a hunk of dead sheep, try to remember that some are vegetarian and some don’t like meat. Then don’t bleat at their boyfriend, “Please. Please stay and help eat the sheep.” Because you just look like an idiot and you should know that your friends like you anyway.

In other news, I have LOST my Gomez tickets. I went on a cleaning frenzy (another attempt to look impressive) and now the tickets that were on the kitchen bench have disappeared.

I’ve spent all evening ferreting around the house and even braved the stanky depths of the dumpster to paw through the rubbish I took out yesterday. No luck.

There’s $130 worth of Gomez floating around there somewhere.

About Shauna Reid

Ahoy there! I’m Shauna, an author, copywriter and content mentor. I love telling stories about life and helping others to tell theirs.

Find out more about me and how we can work together – I’m now booking for January 2022.

27 thoughts on “Dumpster Diving

  1. Wow! Sounds like you’ve been very busy socially!

    And I have to admit to being a bit prone to the ol’ ‘got to be entertaining/interesting/funny/etc’ type feeling, too.

    And that’s really naff of those Gomez tickets to lose themselves. I hope they just happen to turn up in a place you hadn’t thought of checking before the concert!

  2. I would have loved to see that sheepish look. Ah, the things we carnivores take for granted.

    Pity about the tickets. Have you looked under the bed? Things often end up there.

  3. You know…as a meat eater I have no problem with eating vegies. I’ve never understood why vegitarians can’t have a bite of meat now and then…picky picky picky.

    The Gomez tickets are in your kitchen. either near or on the fridge.
    or in a pants or shirt pocket. You’ll find them!

    You sound like you’re still riding that laptop euphoria. WEEEEEE!!!!!!!

  4. RYN: Thanks for the kudos and for stopping by.

    Good luck on the Gomez duckets, that’s a crap-fest if they aren’t found.


    I think I am gonna cry. Noooooo ooooooooooo oooo. I need my Gomez fix. Noooooooooooooooooooooooo ooo o o o oooo.

  6. 🙁

    i suggest: check all the envelopes in your house, i always stuff things into envelopes without labels and live to regret. also think about the weirdest ‘safe place’ you might have decided on putting them and look there. finally check under the couch, your glovebox and all your jeans/coat pockets. you’ll find them!

    slumber party sounds grouse! did anyone rub toothpaste in someone’s hair? did you drink evil concoctions as dares? did you raid ma and pa’s liquor cabinet. teehee.

    as is evident here, complete strangers like me positively adore you shauny, witty anecdotes or not. so your real live friends would always LERVE you, black clouds, witty anecdotes or not.

  7. No they didn’t raid ma and pa’s liquor cabinet, but they crimped HALF my hair. Hrmph. 🙂 We love you Shauny!

  8. What do they look like Shauny? Maybe one of us took them home by mistake.

    And I would have had some more of that lamb for lunch, it was great.

  9. oooh! poor Amy! hehe. nothing like the smell of hair sizzling on a crimping plate…

  10. rowbaby – they were in a plain envelope on the kitchen bench. it had a Registered Mail sticker on it.

    rhiannon had put some old newspapers on the bench to be chucked out, which i did saturday arvo before you guys arrived.

    so last night i went through the dumpster and found the papers and the rubbish bags. ripped them all up, shook every page of the paper… no cigar. bah.

  11. also row – i made a sandwich last night with the last of rach’s bread and mattay’s dick smith cheese and some lamb and tomato… it kicked ass. vive le mouton!

  12. What about under your keyboard? I find the strangest things under mine.

    I can also highly recommend the top of the fridge. Lots of stuff ends up there in our house.

  13. I never invite vegitarians over for dinner, unless it’s a BBQ and they BYO whatever. I like my meat. Mmmmm… dead animal…

  14. if you like, i could unleash my mother on your flat. whenever i lose anything she finds it immediately. “where are my glasses?! i can’t find my glasses! it’s not legal for me to drive without my glasses!”
    “they’re right here, rachael.”

    enter lecture about not being able to find one’s head if it was painted neon and stapled to my arse.

    and enough with the vegetarian bashing! how could you eat anything that had a face and children and probably had a nickname from it’s friends? murderers!

    (exit stage left in melodramatic teenage huff)

  15. Oh Shauny, if only i had bought another you could have come down here and gone with me!

    Decided I’d leave a comment instead of just lurking, hope they turn up!

  16. I’m sure the tickets will turn up, Shauny, altho if it’s anything like my usual luck it’ll be 3 days after the concert.

    I’m assuming Gomez is (are?) a band of some sort. Round here Gomez (along with Sanchez, Hernandez, Gonzalez, Dominguez and Cortez) are just Cuban expats waiting for Fidel to die so they can go home.

  17. Grr…posted a long comment and it was lost by my exceptionally strange fingers hitting the keyboard the wrong way. Needless to say, it involved my fantasy as a nine year old boy of being flagellated by Morticia Addams by a cat o’nine and several John Astin references.

    Allow me to commisserate with the others about your tickets.

  18. You think those vegetables don’t have feelings?

    Actually, I read somewhere that growing rice is just as bad if not worse for the environment than eating cows. But I didn’t want to get into an argument, especially with a uni student with convincing arguments, that I actually like.

  19. I feel the same way that you do when it comes to maintaining a certain level of entertainment. When I’m out with friends, I’m usually always joking around and trying to be funny, and on days where I’m not feeling particularly witty, people tend to hover around me asking if I’m sick. I don’t need to cook though. None of my friends expect that from me. 🙂

    That’s crappy about the tickets and I, obviously, hope you find them!

  20. Have you tried relaxing so that the universe reveal the location of your tickets?

    Have a nice bath, put on some snuggly clothes and get your mind to go totally blank (I have no trouble with that blankness).

    I think sometimes you know subconsciously where things are but are so busy freaking out about losing them that you just can’t think…just like you can’t dance if you think too hard about what you are doing.

    Naps also work. Concentrate on the tickets, have a nap and you might wake up with the answer. I lost my wallet with lots of $$$ once and had a nap. When I woke up I knew it was btw the passenger seat and door in my car.

  21. have they turned up yet? look *under* the fridge too, and down the side of the oven and the backs of your shelves and stuff. i’m good at finding stuff. i lose stuff often so i have much experience.

  22. Sisters under the skin, dearest!

    Up and down, round and round we go….

    Am I interesting enough? Oh, who cares – no one loves me anyway!

    Finding yourself friendless (completely!) one month and immersed in social activities the next.

    At least I’ve learnt to just go with the flow…

Comments are closed.