I go to the Ladies Room at work about six times a day. The bladder is fine, thanks for asking. The new job is perfectly fine too. It's just sometimes you need to escape for a power nap. (I still use the same pillows as I did two years ago. Has anyone been reading that long? I tried resting my chin in my hands but if you stay that way too long you end up with big red streaks on your face like gigantic love bites.) Anyway. I was barging through through the door yesterday when I noticed the door makes a very pronounced groaning sound. And it's a very masculine groan. Like a kick to the groin. I felt kind of bad for the door. Sorry door, I said in my head. So next time I went I was very gentle and the groan sounded almost like an appreciative moan. It is a door of many moods. Today the office was almost deserted so I napped even more than usual and tried out all sorts of techniques on the door, to see what sort of notes I could hit. You know when you kind of open a door with your butt/hip? This guy in the hallway wouldn't stop yapping and I was all, "Yes yes, gotta go gotta go" and sort of entered the Ladies Room backwards. The door gave a pained "Ooof!". Then this afternoon for something different I got violent and charged at it with my shoulder, like a rugby player with a tackle bag. I just thought of a few nasty bastards that I would like to barge and it was quite satisfying to hear that "Urrrrrrrgh" from the door. Tomorrow I will practice my roundhouse kicks.