International Mothership

SHAUNA:  Hello Mother! It’s The Daughter.

MOTHERSHIP:  Hello The Daughter!

S:  I just wanted to call you before we nicked off for the weekend.

M:  Oh yes, Paris. Well you know what they say about Paris.

S:  No?

M:  Pickpockets and bum pinchers. That’s what it’s all about. If they’re not stealing your wallet they’re pinching you on the arse.

S:  Really?

M:  Oh yes. They can be quite rude.

S:  And who told you this?

M:  Oh I read it in the Sunday Telegraph.

S:  Now there’s a reputable source!

M:  If you can’t trust Rupert Murdoch, who can you trust? Now stay out of that Tunnel.

About Shauna Reid

Ahoy there! I’m Shauna, an author, copywriter and content mentor. I love telling stories about life and helping others to tell theirs.

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20 thoughts on “International Mothership

  1. My folks offered a baguette (nothing wrong with it) to a gypsy who was begging in Paris, and were promply rebuffed.

    He drew himself up, utterly furious, ground out “Baguette!!?” *Ptah* , spat at them, and hit my mum in the head with the bread stick before running away.

    Forget the pickpockets. Look out for baguette-wielding gypsies. Murdoch doesn’t know jack.

  2. My roommates in London went to Paris for a weekend and they stayed in a hotel called Mister Bed. That’s all I’m saying.

  3. oooh! have fun in paris.

    you will be back in edinburgh next weekend though, right? looking forward to seeing you then!! woooooooo!

  4. When I had a weekend in Paris, neither pickpocketing nor bum-pinching happened. I did get very, very drunk though.

    Have fun!

  5. Hello from another Shauna. Nice to see someone else knows how to spell…er rather someone else’s mother.

    In Paris, just pinch back. That otta fix ’em.

  6. Dude I’m with your mother on the Tunnel thing. I refuse to go through the Sydney Harbour one as well, for the same reasons. Once I made a wrong turn and nearly ended up driving through the tunnel, I took my chances with swerving into oncoming traffic so I could make a hasty retreat such was my level of freaking out about having to go into the Tunnel. Scares the living crap out of me it does.

  7. The worst thing I found on my recent trip to paris was being tapped for money by a scottish tramp… stay in the big Ed

  8. so, was le derriere pinched?

    i trust rupert murdoch. still annoyed i never got to be his daughter-in-law, though. was very sad the day lachlan married sarah …

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