Live Together In Perfect Harmony

– If you sniggeringly call a housemate 'Bruce' behind her back because she listens to Mr Springsteen all the fucking time, avoid forgetting her real name and accidentally calling her 'Bruce' to her face. The ensuing silence will kill you.

– During the Official Inquiry into Mysterious Short & Crinkly Hairs in Shower, it is okay to walk off to the pub with the excuse, "Well don't look at me, I'm a redhead."

– If you discover a housemate has been using your laundry powder, it is perfectly reasonable to add bleach to her bottle of fabric softener.

About Shauna Reid

Ahoy there! I’m Shauna, an author, copywriter and content mentor. I love telling stories about life and helping others to tell theirs.

Find out more about me and how we can work together – I’m now booking for November 2020.

25 thoughts on “Live Together In Perfect Harmony

  1. Bruce? The Boss? Holy cow, the last time I heard of someone loving Bruce, it was Mallory off Family Ties figuring out if she loved him or David Lee Roth more.

  2. heh, I’m tempted to enquire about the Mysterious Short & Crinkly Hairs in Shower at my house. Or the ones on the Soap

    I wonder how I would raise the topic 😉

  3. Ahhh… the short and crinkly fairies have visited your house as well. I think there’s a plague of them right now.

    Bleach? You are an EVIL GENIUS!

  4. You can come live with me, Shauny. We need a third roommate anyway. And no short & curlies EVER show up in our shower…

  5. Never mind the short and crinklies, I once had a housemate who literally moulted in the shower, I’m talkin’ WADS of hair here, of ALL descriptions. Clogged up the plughole and all. Eww. She sucked.

  6. …don’t forget everyone’s favourite ‘prawns in the curtain rod’ trick….then they’ll *really* be needing the bleach!

  7. Doesn’t one have to be lactating in order to have one’s milk pinched?

    Could mb tell us her secrets of a non-curly tub? Inquiring minds want to know…

  8. Well, I’m a firm believer in shaving, and as for my roommate, I asked him and he’s not telling. Any more questions? Hmmm?

  9. Faith, that is through awful and out into unforgiveable.

    I lurv it!

    Sounds like you have an official Evil flatmate Shauny, straighten ’em out good n proper, I say.

    Or leave in the dead of night like a great namby-pamby coward, as I have been known to …

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