Diane, it’s 3pm

This post is brought to you by Apple’s voice to text dictation thingy.

I had some surgery last week which I’ll write about soon. My left arm is out of action for a couple of weeks. I’m determined not to fail on my writing bet with Jimmy. No not Jimmy I said Jeanette. JENNETTE. But I’m rubbish at typing with one hand. So here I am yapping at the computer feeling like a twit.

It’s weird speaking out loud like this. I always thought I wrote microscope. No not microscope. Wrote like I spoke. It turns out my brain is better connected to my fingertips than it is to my mouth. I’m not feeling very articulate in this format! How did people dictate murders in the old days without feeling like like an idiot? Letters, not murders! I don’t think the computer likes my accent.

My sister is visiting for a few days. Later on she’s going to help me wash my hair which is totally hottie no grotty after a week of neglect. Das Gareth said he was unqualified in the field of hair washing. But he has been making great cups of tea. I’m bloody lucky and thankful for all the groovy people in my life and return the favour as soon as I can.

Net flicks update! I have been watching out of parts. No. House of cards. It’s a come down after Friday night lights, and there is nothing about any of the characters I can remotely warm to, but Kevin Stacey Stacey Stacey SPACEY and Robin Wright – ok how come it understands Robin Wright but not given Stacey, no Kevin Spacey? oh now you’ve got it – are such great actors and so beautiful to look at, that I’m hooked.

It’s taken me half an hour to write this dribble dribble dribble DR I VEL so I will spare you any further disjointed renting renting renting RANTING. Have a good week, good people!

About Shauna Reid

Ahoy there! I’m Shauna, an author, copywriter and content mentor. I love telling stories about life and helping others to tell theirs.

Find out more about me and how we can work together – I’m now booking for January 2022.

39 thoughts on “Diane, it’s 3pm

  1. I don’t need the dictation to get confused by my accent (although I like to set the Siri voice to Australian because she sounds better than English *guy* and it might understand my Kiwi better), I just had to do my old job – which often involved calling Helpdesks to log calls. You really understand what your accent’s like when you see what they think you said written down. Fortunately – most people soon got used to it 😉

    Get well soon left arm!!!! 🙂

  2. Wow, good of you to carry on with the dictating. It seemed that it was fairly challenging. I kind of agree with you on “House of Cards” – I watched the whole first season and was interested, but not really glued to it. I haven’t started the new season yet, but I do love watching Kevin Spacey and Robin Wright is also very appealing to watch. I always envy her fitness.

    I hope your healing goes well and good for you that you have some lovely helpers.

  3. I just wanted to let everyone know I was willing to give Shauna a no-penalty sick-day pass for our writing challenge this week. I’m very impressed that you soldiered through, Shauna! And thank you for spending so much effort getting my name spelled right 🙂

    XO Jimmy 🙂

  4. No-one under the age of 70 can dictate so well done. When I tell people my name they think I’m saying Amber for some reason. Hope your wound is healing and your spirits are good.

  5. I’m delighted to see you post no matter the format or the odd word here and there. Glad you have your sis there to help you with the hair washing…..think how lovely that will feel! I’m sure Dr G is aces at making tea…a very important job to be sure! Take care Shauna, I think of you all the time and hope you are healing well.

    Lori F.
    (U & R)

  6. Hope you recover quickly from your surgery.

    Was it because of RSI?

    Hope you can train your computer to speak Aussie with a download.

    Shout out to your caregivers Gareth and sis-nothing like cups-of-tea-on-demand and having someone wash you hair for you.

    1. took me nearly a week to clock about the downloads, thank you gazillions! can i blame the painkillers? 🙂

  7. Hope your arm feels better soon.
    This post is hilarious, I laughed all the way through. Thank you very much.

  8. Yikes, hope your arm heals quickly! (re this post, as Nora Ephron said, quoting her screenwriter mother, it’s all material!) And you didn’t lose your bet with Jimmy, so there’s that.

  9. “Dictate murders”! I thought you meant like Emperor Nero or something! Ha ha!

    The BBC version of “House of Cards” is good, even though everyone is despicable– the acting is superb and there are lots of pretty shots of the Houses of Parliament. Plus, it’s only about 4 episodes long.

    Get well soon, Shauna!

  10. Hilarious! You should always use this method to write your blogs. I can just see you repeating those “trouble” words in that wonderful Australian lilt (spellcheck wanted to write “lily” there–NO! LILT–you twit!) of yours. Heal quickly!!

  11. Hey Shauna, glad to see you’re still around in the blogosphere! I used to drop by your blog circa 2001 and have finally returned to the underworld (although blogging looks more mainstream these days). I used to host something along the lines of pernicious.net (?). I had a lot of pink and blue going on back then, with a dash of My Little Pony eyes at the top of the page.

    Aaaanyway, am currently enjoying your blog and had a good kak at your post just now. 🙂

    Over and out!

  12. LOVE the Twin Peaks reference (I miss that show so much although I still have no idea what actually happened for most of the several years of the series).

    I was listening to a program on the radio about a new tea plantation in Scotland and realized with a smile that it was actually based in your former hometown, so I think I need to come for a visit and some “serious” tea tasting!


  13. Get well Shauna’s arm!! But keep using the dictation thing even when your arm is better – way funny!!

  14. Well I hope you get better soon, I know surgery sucks! In the meantime I shall enjoy your dictation blogs because I am all to familiar with the crazy auto correct function on smart devices. For being called smart devices they sure don’t seem to be very intelligent do they?

    Dictate murders….that’s hilarious!

  15. thank you very much you legends! i am doing a lot better and gettung fsdter at right hand typing if not entirely accurate 🙂

  16. I spent entirely too much time trying to figure out what “dictate murders” meant. (Do Australian people call mystery novels “murders”?) before realizing it was part of your dictation struggle. LOL!

    What kind of software is that anyway?

  17. Hi Shauna,
    First of all I would just like to say that I LOVE you. Even though I am a 18-year old girl from Finland I could absolutely relate and feel your book amazing adventures of dietgirl (or dieettitytön huimat seikkailut in finnish 😀 ). I could relate to your pain of looking “wrong”, the loneliness, the struggles but also the inner power that lies on us (wow, that sounded very tacky. But hey, it´s true.) I would just like to applaud to you, on how BRAVE you are and how comforting it is to read that other people go through same kind of struggles every day than you. Even thoug my BMI is 22, I have been struggling with my weight since I was 8. I was a big child, or that was the image I had, even though I was completely normal. I was brutally bullied in school because of my baby fat from ages about 7-13, and it had left a crack in my self-esteem and a picture that self-esteem means skinny. Otherwise, you are just worthless. Anyway, since then I have been dieting, keeping foodjournal every now and then, losing weight, gaining weight, excercising like crazy, having periods of absolutely no physical activity and binging on ridicilous amounts of food, hating my body, missing out on opportunities just because I am so embarrased of my weight.. The list could go on and on. Keeping it simple, I haven´t spend a day in my life since my childhood I haven´t though about my weight. And yes, it is exchausting.
    I laughed and yes, I cried a little reading your story. I just really wanted to thank you for having the guts to publish difficult things with your own name and face behind it. You are much more brave than I am. I can look up to you.
    I am sorry that I ended up writing a novel with my horrible english on your comment box. I just really wanted to say: Thank you. Not everyday you don´t find a role model that is beautiful, warm but also INSANELY funny. I laughed so much reading your book. Take care,
    Helmi xx

    1. Oh Helmi, thank you so much for your lovely comment. Always love to hear Finland readers! I’m really glad you liked the book and wanted wish you lots of courage, too. Just know that you are not alone with this stuff! Big hugs 🙂

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