Last Friday we handed the keys of the Brown House to its new owners. After very smelly beginnings we loved that place in all its 1970s glory. But much has changed since 2009 so it was time to pass the brown baton. Apparently the new owners plan to do all the Someday things – replace the aged kitchen, bathroom, stairs… and put in an en-suite! Looks like they have no need for a bedroom beer cellar.
We paid a visit to finalise things and camped out in the living room for old times’ sake. We narrowed down our favourite Brown House memories. Mine: the time Gareth was putting up curtains and the curtain rod slipped from his grasp and donked him right on the head. He was so infuriated that he chucked the screwdriver across the room where it donked the light switch plate, smashing it in half and giving him twice as many DIY jobs to complete.
His happiest memory was the time I got up early one morning to go down to the loo. I somehow slipped and went down the stairs on my arse with a cartoony CLONK CLONK CLONK CLONK CLONK BANG.
Rhiannon was staying over at the time and both she and Gareth rushed out of their rooms to find me in a crumpled heap on the floor. After quickly establishing I was fine, they howled and howled with laughter as the sound + crumpled heap combo was apparently all too much. To this day Gareth only has to say, “Remember Shauna… the stairs?” and Rhi instantly splutters, “Those clonks! That crumpled pile of Shauna!” as tears of mirth stream down her face.
Maybe your fondest family memories aren’t based on the misfortunes of others, but slapstick is timeless for us!
Anyway. To mark this life transition I wanted to gather some less painful memories…
This Artex. If you stared at the ceiling long enough… self-hypnosis.
The time that Gareth found a typewriter at the tip and spent months restoring it so we could type stupid notes.
The time the little girls next door gave me this classy manicure. They’d set up a beauty parlour on the street and it only set me back 20p.
Also, this lush green crop in the field behind the house that made a satisfying swishy sound in the wind.
The moment each year when the bluebells arrived in the woods up the road.
Our gardening efforts were patchy… we never could top the huge ass parsnips of 2010!
Strawberry wine experiment + always reliable pea shoots.
After the initial de-stinkification efforts we never got around to much decorating, aside from painting the dining room BLUE, as Gareth explains here in an attempted Aussie accent.
That time he photobombed the tiny Christmas tree.
The snowy moments of 2009 and 2010…
All the birds…
(This “rustic” fence is fixed now, by the way. Thanks Jon!)
Gareth’s garage brewery…
The tree that cast groovy shadows on the bedroom wall.
And thus endeth the Brown House adventure!