It’s one of those projects you begin with wild enthusiasm, then immediately wonder why the bloody hell you started. We’re painting the inside walls of the garage, or more accurately Gareth’s Hobby Lair. It’s home to bicycles, motorbikes, homemade homebrewing contraptions, and tools of many kinds.
Shortly after moving in he noticed that the garage floor wasn’t sealed properly, so his hobbies were getting coated in a fine layer of grey dust. He spent a couple of weekends sealing the floors. This turned the floors a grim, depressing grey. Which in turn made the grim, depressing grey of the concrete block walls look even more so.
The logical solution was to paint the walls a bright white. We calculated it would be a long weekend’s work but it’s been three so far. One reason is that the concrete blocks are chunky and rough so you have to hurl paint at them repeatedly then really stab it in with your brush, over and over and over again. But the main reason is beause it’s flipping cold and we can only work in short shifts before the shivers and madness take over.
Personally I’m sort of enjoying it. It’s not like painting inside, you can really slap it on and make a mess. We turn the radio to 6 Music and sing along and grind the paint into the bricks in time with the music. The first wall was accompanied by Lemmy tributes. The second was poignant with non-stop Bowie. So many brilliant tunes. Devastated. Not sure if they will pay homage to our fallen Eagle this weekend. I hope we don’t lose any more 70s icons before we hit the last wall.
Although it’s been a pretty mild winter so far, Gareth isn’t enjoying the cold. Between the garage shifts and his long days toiling in a chilly brewery he just can’t get warm. He claims after 43 Scottish winters his bones are finally turning to mould.
He keeps watching Outback Truckers, in which fair dinkum Aussie truck drivers haul their giant loads all over the reddest, dryest parts of the great Southern land. He insists he wants to go the Pilbara as seen on a recent episode, and just “dry out for a few months”. I reminded him that he struggled to cope with a mere 30’C overnight in Sydney, unable to do nowt but lay very still on the bed squarking, “Too hot! Don’t touch me!”. But no, this time he says he’d welcome extreme heat and the many creatures that want to kill you.
The other day I started this cool Make Films course, in an attempt to make my wonky egg vending machine videos better. Our first mission was to make a teeny 15 second film about our weekend. Xanthe is an kind and generous teacher, encouraging you to start small and not worry about techy details – just get in there and shoot snippets of your everyday life. My issue was I kept forgetting to shoot. But when I did, I’m proud to say I finally managed to hold the phone horizontally! And I was delighted when I played back a snippet of Gareth painting a mercifully non-nobbly chunk of garage wall that I’ve captured his grumbling!
I missed his first line, which was:
I’m going to fly south for the winter.
Then he says:
Like a goose.
*large, dramatic sigh*
I don’t care if it’s dusty.
I’m going anyway.
This is the stuff I’ll treasure when I’m 80 years old, finally retired to the Pilbara.